Absolutely the Funniest Item of the Day CCXXVII

Curtsies, lots of them, to CDR Salamander.

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Absolutely the Funniest Item of the Day CCXXVI

Wheat & Weeds - “Radical Muslims”

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Absolutely the Funniest Item of the Day CCXXV

Finally Drudge comes through with a transcript.

We want ideas to save our planet, to save the planet from the imperialist threat. And hopefully in this very century, in not too long a time, we will see this, we will see this new era, and for our children and our grandchildren a world of peace based on the fundamental principles of the United Nations, but a renewed United Nations.

And maybe we have to change location. Maybe we have to put the United Nations somewhere else; maybe a city of the south. We’ve proposed Venezuela.

You know that my personal doctor had to stay in the plane. The chief of security had to be left in a locked plane. Neither of these gentlemen was allowed to arrive and attend the U.N. meeting. This is another abuse and another abuse of power on the part of the Devil. It smells of sulfur here, but God is with us and I embrace you all.

Oh, man. It’s just hysterical.

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Absolutely the Funniest Item of the Day CCXXIV

I was about to throw in the towel, be rid of my contacts, and retire to bed with my book, but I decided one last perusal of the interweb…

Insight Scoop - Headline of the hour

I would say, “Headline of the day,” but they are coming in at such a dizzying rate, I’d better hedge my bets. Here it is:

Church stands by pope (DNAIndia.com)

Whew! I, for one, was wondering if such would be the case. That is good news indeed. Stay tuned.

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Absolutely the Funniest Item of the Day CCXXIII

From the internet, via No Left Turns:

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats, and have raised their security level from “Miffed” to “Peeved.” Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to “Irritated” or even “A Bit Cross.” Londoners have not been “A Bit Cross” since the blitz in 1940, when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from “Tiresome” to a “Bloody Nuisance.” The last time the British issued a “Bloody Nuisance” warning level was during the great fire of 1666.

In addition, the French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from “Run” to “Hide.” The only two higher levels in France are “Surrender” and “Collaborate.” The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France’s white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country’s military capability.

It’s not only the English and French that are on a heightened level of alert. Italy has increased the alert level from “Shout Loudly and Excitedly” to “Elaborate Military Posturing.” Two more levels remain: “Ineffective Combat Operations” and “Change Sides.”

The Germans increased their alert state from “Disdainful Arrogance” to “Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.” They also have two higher levels: “Invade a Neighbor” and “Lose.”

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual, and the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

Curtsy: Wheat & Weeds.

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Absolutely the Funniest Item of the Day CCXXII

The Klein Four Group is “a very talented a cappella group ‘of the world of higher mathematics’ of the Northwestern University mathematics department”, singing:

Finite Simple Group (of Order Two): A Mathematical Love Song

Lyrics:

The path of love is never smooth
But mine’s continuous for you
You’re the upper bound in the chains of my heart
You’re my Axiom of Choice, you know it’s true

But lately our relation’s not so well-defined
And I just can’t function without you
I’ll prove my proposition and I’m sure you’ll find
We’re a finite simple group of order two

I’m losing my identity
I’m getting tensor every day
And without loss of generality
I will assume that you feel the same way

Since every time I see you, you just quotient out
The faithful image that I map into
But when we’re one-to-one you’ll see what I’m about
‘Cause we’re a finite simple group of order two

Our equivalence was stable,
A principal love bundle sitting deep inside
But then you drove a wedge between our two-forms
Now everything is so complexified

When we first met, we simply connected
My heart was open but too dense
Our system was already directed
To have a finite limit, in some sense

I’m living in the kernel of a rank-one map
From my domain, its image looks so blue,
‘Cause all I see are zeroes, it’s a cruel trap
But we’re a finite simple group of order two

I’m not the smoothest operator in my class,
But we’re a mirror pair, me and you,
So let’s apply forgetful functors to the past
And be a finite simple group, a finite simple group,
Let’s be a finite simple group of order two
(Oughter: “Why not three?”)

I’ve proved my proposition now, as you can see,
So let’s both be associative and free
And by corollary, this shows you and I to be
Purely inseparable. Q. E. D.

8 Responses to “Absolutely the Funniest Item of the Day CCXXII”

  1. Brett_McS Says:

    I thought I had heard the last of Group Theory.

    You know that Pure Mathematicians use Group Theory to derive the natural numbers (1,2,3)? Yes, they are all geeks.

  2. ninme Says:

    No I didn’t know. I never got past Trig 2.

    Why on earth are you still up? It’s a school night!

  3. ,5MT Says:

    Nooooooo! Thisn a Algebra frei blog!

    /under the futon

  4. Brett_McS Says:

    I couldn’t thweep.

  5. ninme Says:

    Must be a full moon comin’. Half’s under the futon and you can’t thweep.

  6. Rueful Red Says:

    Trig was OK, it was calculus that got me. I just didn’t believe in it, somehow. Nowadays I walk past what’s left of the castle that belonged to the guy who invented a version of it most mornings, happily reflecting that his achievement goes entirely uncelebrated as far as I can see.

  7. Brett_McS Says:

    I trust ninme sent you that list of everything invented by Scots? Shall we add calculus?

  8. Rueful Red Says:

    ‘Fraid so. Napier. Actually it was logarithms. Or maybe calculus. Big row with the German Liebnitz.

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