In Which She Goes to Columbia
I managed to skate by this topic all week, but this I just can’t leave:
Telegraph - Ahmadinejad takes insults in his stride. By Bryony Gordon
You can just imagine the scene.
Evil dictator with nuclear programme who hates a country so much he has called for it to be wiped off the face of the earth arrives in his next most-hated country after several hours of having to sit through terrible movies, eating food that tastes like cardboard.
“Excuse me, sir,” says the officer. “What is the purpose of your visit: business or pleasure?”
Mr Ahmadinejad surveys the fat, sweating security man in front of him and imagines sentencing him to 300 lashes for having the audacity to speak to someone as important as he.
He pats down his fake Hugo Boss suit and composes himself.
“In the name of God, the compassionate, the merciful, I have been sent here to tell the truth about the Islamic Republic of Iran to your American people and to condemn your leader for his lies about our divine country.”
He smooths back his immaculately coiffed hair.
(Coiffed? Huh?)
“But I also quite fancy going up the Empire State Building and travelling in one of those yellow taxis, so a bit of both, I suppose.”
Satisfied by this response, the mad, murderous tyrant, who doth protest a little too often that his country’s nuclear programme is perfectly innocent, is waved through.
You’ve got to laugh. Which is just as well, really, because after watching Ahmadinejad’s performance at Columbia University this week, that’s all that one could do.
There’s no homosexuality in Iran, claims Ahmatalkingaloadofrubbish.
Then again, his country’s rather stringent internet laws may prevent him from logging on to www.homanla.org, or the Iranian Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender organisation, as it is otherwise known. (Did you know that the only country to perform more sex-change operations than Thailand is Iran?)
Lawdy. Thank god for Thailand.
Update:
I mean, in combination with this, from November last year: Now For the Iranian Whores
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